Thursday, March 25, 2010

The Manito-ROT-a

(a parody of a parody)
Ruminations on life in Manitowoc County

Go placidly amid the noise and waste,
and remember what comfort there may be in owning a piece of Tripple P.
Avoid quiet and passive persons, unless you have to speak to a County Supervisor.
Rotate your tires.
Speak glowingly of those greater than yourself
and heed well the advice of Chairman Jim Brey, even though he be a turkey.
Know what to kiss... and when.
Consider that two wrongs never make a right... but that three do.
Wherever possible, stay in touch by email.
Be comforted that in the face of all coming storms and disillusionment,
and despite the collapsing revenue streams of our time
there is always a big future in labor outsourcing.

Remember the Health Care Center.
Strive at all times to bend, fold, spindle, and mutilate.
Know yourself. If you need help, call Sharon Cornils.
Exercise caution in your daily affairs,
especially with those persons closest to you...
that Jeff Beyer, for instance.
Be assured that a walk through the ocean of most County Official’s souls
would scarcely get your feet wet.
Fall not in love, therefore; that costs money.
Gracefully surrender the things of youth,
birds, clean air, taxes, health care, highways,
and let not the ideas of others enter your head.
Hire people with connections.
For a good time call 683-4080. Ask for Todd.
Take heart amid the deepening gloom
that your dog is finally getting enough cheese,
and reflect that whatever misfortune may be your lot,
it could only be worse in Milwaukee County.

You are the only one complaining!
You have no right to those documents!
Whether you can hear it or not,
the hockey moms are laughing behind your back.

Therefore, make peace with your god,
whatever you conceive him to be:
omnipotent County Executive or torturing Vice President.
With all its hopes, dreams, promises, and privatizations,
the County continues to deteriorate.

Give up!

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